My life is a rollercoaster ride. I don’t know what the future holds. My life experiences have shaped me into the person I am today. Every story is unique, but I believe my story is meaningful and can be used by many people. My family has gone through many difficult times since my birth. These experiences include no money and violence. My uncle decided that we needed a better way of living. He became our sponsor and petitioned for me and my father to visit the United States of America. His brother sponsored my dad, and his children were automatically sponsored. We finally reached the US five years after many years.
Since then, our lives have been rearranged to be American. Although it was an amazing experience to escape a third-world country, I still faced problems in the country as I’m ‘different. Two of the biggest problems I faced were racism and anxiety about my siblings and mother staying in Jamaica. Jamaicans have never experienced racism or witnessed it happen. “Out Of Many One People” has been our motto. It means that everyone is treated equally, and all citizens are united. Since my arrival in America, I have been treated differently. I recall that the counselor at the school tried to get me into ELA. ELA is a class meant for non-English speakers. My parent and myself kept telling the counselor I was very fluent with English because that’s what I grew-up learning. Another was that students began to mock my accent and the color of me skin at school. It was common for them to make fun of my skin color and how different I look from an African-American. This made me feel insecure when I walked through my school’s halls, or when I was about do presentations in front my class. I was unable to accept my culture and began to change my speech style to be more like an American. As I grew older, my accent began to fade and I found myself unable to embrace my culture as fully as I did in the past. Because I was determined to not allow bad influences to change me, I began to speak the way I normally talk. These experiences taught me it’s okay to be different. I also learned it’s fine to embrace who you are and your history. My culture influences me, but it is also what motivates me to succeed in school. My mom has made so many sacrifices for my children that she is my greatest motivation to excel in school. Because of the violence there, I worry about my mom and other family members. My motivation comes from her. One of my goals is to sponsor my mother and my siblings to travel to the USA and live the life I envisioned. My mom is also my motivation. Every time I feel like giving in, I think about why it is that I do what I do. My mom is my motivation. I see her smile and it inspires me to work hard for the things I want. My character is nothing if I don’t have a meaningful background. Some experiences can feel like going on a rollercoaster. Each person has their own story. My story is what defines who I am as a person. My life would be incomplete if it hadn’t been for the difficult times in my past. At the beginning of my childhood, I can recall being happy. Between the ages of one and one, I didn’t experience any significant events. My fraternal twin and eldest sibling were my parents. I was a mommy’s girl growing up. I was always attached to my mother. I was not affected by my father’s absence until later in life. My mother was my sole caregiver so I was fortunate to have multiple babysitters. Each one was special to me. I trusted everyone at that age. I was loved unconditionally by everyone around me. Until my later years, I had no trouble trusting people until I learned that they can deceive. Erikson stated that infants can gain hope if there is a good balance between trust and distrust in his first theory. I had more faith that everything would be fine. It’s important that parents discipline their children. It’s the only way to learn from mistakes. I didn’t have any trouble growing up. However, I did make some mistakes. I wanted to be independent.
So that my mom can see that I’m mature for my age. My mom was always the first to notice me in public. She would panic if it was less than two feet away. New York was a different place than Virginia. I was always eager to get outside, but my mom kept me inside the house. It was dangerous out there. I couldn’t grasp her point-of-view because she was so young. I wondered why we couldn’t go outside as we grew older. It made my feel wrong. I tried to understand the world around and it felt like I was being punished. Erikson’s fourth development theory, Industry vs. inferiority, was something that I had difficulty with. I found it difficult to understand school as more than a pastime. New York’s school system was quite different than Virginia’s. When I first moved to New York, I felt like I was actually learning something. I used to go to speech classes when first arriving in the area. This is something I struggle with every day. I could not pronounce certain words so I found ways around it. It was strange because I used to go to speech classes with people three grades below me. Although my speech was better, I still felt different than the other kids in my class. I felt inferior to my peers because of this. However, I realized that it was impossible to compare yourself with others. Every person is different. My identity was always difficult to forge because I was a twin. We were always compared together. We were all alike from our birth until middle school. I can confirm that it was not easy to find my identity. It is still changing. I was afraid to be who I really am. Although I knew what my goals were in life, I was always afraid of what others would think. That was when I realized my struggles with identity. From that time on, girls wanted each other to be the same. It didn’t work for me. I could not be like them. The desire for trying out different self-types and the need to stick with one must be balanced (Kail Kavanaugh. 2017). This is crucial for the young mind. Insecure and self-conscious throughout my teens made me feel insecure. People are under a lot pressure to live up to a standard. Parents, teachers, as well as society, are vital to positive reinforcement. It is impossible to be your true self and find it if you don’t believe in yourself. In my youth, I had no interest in being in a marriage. My focus was on getting a job at a fast food joint and completing school well. It’s something I now realize is how special it is to be able to share my journey with someone. The good and the bad. Mentally, it is important to build a healthy and happy relationship. While I would be happy to be alone, I prefer having two parents. I am afraid of the unknown. Although I know what my goals are, I don’t know when or how they will be realized. Although I am a successful professional, I often think back to my childhood. My mom was a multi-tasker. My mom would work multiple jobs and I would only see her occasionally. Even though it isn’t her fault, it still affects some part of me. It’s important to think of ways you can help future generations. It’s a great idea to share my knowledge and education for the benefit of society. At this time in my life, there is no need to dwell on the past and what I should’ve done. I want contentment with my life. I don’t mind how my body dies, so long as it is peaceful with those around me. I overcame many obstacles but it didn’t define me. It didn’t affect my future. I was able to grow stronger through my stages of life. I found myself over the years. I’m proud of the person that I have become. My children are happy. It is a comfort to know that I had a positive effect on their lives. Knowing that I made an impact on this world will be what I die.
